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 Signs in offices

 

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." ************************** In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." ***************** ********* On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels ************************** At a Proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit, please back in." ************************** On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." ************************** On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber." ************************** On a Church's Bill board: "7 days without God makes one weak." ************************** At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee : "Invite us to your next blowout." ************************** At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows." ************************** On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." ************************** In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action." ************************** On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." ************************** At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." ************************** On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." ************************** On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!" ************************** At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." ************************** Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." ************************** In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" ************************** At the Electric Company "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be." ************** ************ In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up." ************************** In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." ************************** At a Propane Filling Station: "Thank heaven for little grills." ************************** And don't forget the sign at a CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP: "Best place in town to take a leak."  ********************** Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:  "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"