Have a good laugh....

  

Jokes . ....some new, some old......... Wife & Husband Wife:   How have you managed to get home so early today??? Husband:   My boss lost his temper with me and shouted.....                  "Go to Hell".  So I came home.   Black Guy & a White Girl A Black Guy and a White Girl met at a nightclub. She took him to her apartment and said.....  Tie me to the bed and do what black men do best!!! So he ran off with the TV and VCD. Wife & Husband Wife:   I wish I were a newspaper so you can hold me every morning!!! Husband:   I wish you're a newspaper TOO, my dear, so I can have a NEW onE every morning!!!   Not at all A 70 years old Man asks his wife:   Do you feel sad when you see me running behind young girls??? Wife replied:   No, not at all. Even dogs chase cars let alone nice cars but they can't drive it. Don't Disgrace your Family A young Chinese Girl going on her 1st Date. Her mother warned her:   First he kisses your cheek;  then he'll kiss your breasts, you'll enjoy;  then he wants to go on top..... You must not allow it so as not to disgrace our family name. Next day Girl told Mom:   Everything happened exactly as you predicted.  I didn't allow him to go on top so I went on top and disgraced his family.       Expiry Date Wife:   Honey, what are you looking for??? Husband:   Nothing. Wife:   Nothing? You have been reading our marriage certificate for an hour??? Husband:   I was looking for the expiry date!!!  Why Black? Boy:   Mom, why am I black and you are white??? Mom:   Listen Son, considering all the crazy things I did years ago, you should be thankful that you are not barking!!!